- Kareen B.
For as long as humans have roamed the Earth, humanity has always debated the topic of free will. What's free will? What's destiny? Can free will and destiny coexist? Well, this is what I have learned from doing psychic readings, and from my own experiences:
We all have specific lessons we agreed to learn prior to being incarnated. We set up a life plan, a life chart, this is also known as your Ashakic Records. These records contain specific lessons you are required to learn for your soul’s growth. Depending on your consciousness level and connection with Spirit, some intuitively know what their journey will entail. Your soul’s energy strengthens with each lesson it learns, and this vibration follows you each time after you pass on. That is why after some people pass they are easier to communicate with; their energy vibrates stronger from the collective energy they’ve gained throughout all of the lives they have lived. When a lesson has been learned, and it’s time to move on, you can recognize this by your by situations in your life becoming more challenging, and your emotions being more negative than positive. This is Spirits way of showing you that you are done with this chapter of your life. Your free will comes into play here. You have the choice to not move on. Though, by not doing so, repeated issues will continue to present themselves, and a cycle of the same type of issues will continue to follow you. This comes in forms of repeated dreams or nightmares, repeated negative relationships of all types, emotions, unhappiness at work, and from this we can develop negative behaviors: drinking, smoking, over eating, etc. We have our free will as a choice. We can choose to take a path or not take a path, it’s not forced upon us (though sometimes it seems like it). I often hear people say “I didn’t have a choice, I had to…”, this means they intuitively knew their lesson was up, and they were no longer learning from their present situation. Often people who feel this way are old souls, as the issue has most likely followed them from a past life. These people intuitively know that if they don’t gain the strength to move on, this lesson will present itself again in their next life.
So, how does destiny come into play? Destiny is a specific event or events that are meant to happen to us. We created these events prior to our arrival on earth. They are meant to happen. When destiny has taken hold of your life, the Universe will tend to shake your life up to get you to where you are supposed to be. Depending on how far off your path you are determines how difficult your transition will be. The perfect example that comes to mind is a failed relationship. I guess this is the part where I use myself as an example.
About 5 years ago, I unexpectedly became pregnant. My daughter’s father and I weren’t on the best terms, we had more of a low vibrating relationship: partying was our commonality. I decided to try and make the relationship work, how could I not? Isn’t that what we all do? Well, my relationship was an awful rollercoaster ride. Extreme highs and lows is what my life consisted of, and it became progressively worse. I would cry every night. I rotated between different friends and family members for support. Everyone grew tired of hearing me complain about the same issues. It was also difficult for them to hear how unhappy I was. I was desperate for advice, though I never took it. I was in such a dark and lonely place. No one ever told me what to do, no one ever told me to leave him. I guess they knew I needed to make that choice myself, and in time, I eventually would. A friend once told me “When you know, you’ll know, and you will know.” That sentence still echoes through my mind.
The sun began to shine through my dark cloud when my friend Nikki found a Groupon for a yoga class. Or, maybe I found it? Someone found it, so we figured it was the perfect time to try it. After my first class, I knew this is where I belonged. The most spiritual yoga studio in San Diego was a block away from my house. Obviously, this was meant to be. I remember one of the teachers explaining yoga is like therapy, "don’t be surprised if you find yourself crying on your mat.". That I did, but for the first time in a long time I felt an emotion; I felt peace. I felt peace for the first time in years. This studio felt like home to me, a feeling I had been longing for for quite some time.
I still remember the first time I meditated. I locked my bedroom door, put music on, sat on the floor with my back against the wall. Not even two minutes into it my entire spine started to heat up. I then saw who now I know is one of my spirit guides. It freaked me out, I couldn’t believe it. People spent years trying to connect, the first time I tried, I did? Huh? He had a huge smile on his face, spread from ear to ear. He said "Hello Kareen." I remember thinking, how does he know my name? I got scared, opened my eyes, and kept the experience to myself. Obviously this was meant to be, but at the time I saw it as a coincidence and brushed it off. Shortly after, my house became a playground for Spirit. My daughters toys would go off by themselves, our TV would turn on and off by itself, my phone would play songs on its own. My daughter began to talk about my deceased aunt. I would put her to bed, and then hear her giggling as if someone was tickling her. One night I left the door cracked open, I crawled in her room, hid, and watched. She was calling for “Brenda”, and then, it was as if she appeared as she started to play peek-a-boo with no one. She squirmed and giggled as if someone was tickling her. No one was there. This happened often.
I started meditating every night. I joined spiritual groups and that is where I met an amazing psychic who told me I was like her. She told me I was so gifted and I would be famous one day from a book that I will write, and from all the psychic readings I will do. Ha! That's when my life did a complete 180. Looking back on my life, everything then made sense; my nightmares, my visions, my fear of the dark, the reason why I just know things, my dreams, lights turning off on their own, my connection with my deceased aunt, my ability to know what people were thinking and going to say before they said it, the reason I was seeing peoples dead relatives in my mind, the reason why I was so obsessed with ghosts. It all pointed to the fact that I was a psychic-medium. I was so disconnected from myself, I didn’t even realize it!
Over the next year my relationship got progressively worse. I was changing, I was becoming stronger. The Universe was pushing me in the direction I was meant to go in. I was finally ready to no longer be controlled, to live a life I was meant to live. On February of 2012, I finally gained the courage to move on without him, and I did.
My daughter and I moved in with my amazingly supportive parents. Everyday my Mom would sit with me on her bench swing. I would cry, and together we would swing. She helped me get through the hardest part of my life. She was a Mom to my daughter. She helped me realize that this was my new normal. She helped my transition go much smoother than I had expected it to. Some days were harder than others. I was forced to deal with all the emotions I had been suppressing. Years of suppressed emotions equals layers of negativity to chisel through. Within weeks I found a job, got a brand new car (he kept mine), and made a whole bunch of new friends. Within the year I was offered an amazing job that is now my career, a brand spanking new apartment with cheap rent, and …my gift. EVERYTHING began to finally work out for me. I was now able to be who I was meant to be.
Within all of the ugliness such beauty arose. That’s how life works. Some thing beautiful always comes out of the ugliest situations. I had to go through extreme amounts of pain to find my soul, to find my destiny in life. After I removed all of the layers I was hiding behind I found my amazing psychic ability. Since I was a little girl I always wanted to help people. My dreams are slowly coming to a reality. Im still not where I wish to be, but I'm getting there. I have now learned to go with the flow. I have learned not to cling to anyone or anything. The relationships in our lives are like the waves in the ocean; they are presented to us, and pulled away all in a specific timing. We have no control over it. Though we can choose to chase what isn’t ours, it just leaves us feeling empty inside. The only thing you can count on in this world is yourself.
So you see, my destiny, my life chart, was to walk my path solo for a while; to once and for all leave an unhealthy relationship behind. The Universe pushed me in the way to finding myself. My free will kept me in an unhealthy situation that I was no longer learning or growing from. In turn, it did more damage than my soul has anticipated. I’ve spent the last three years mending wounds I have taken on throughout my life. I now know that prior to incarnating, my daughters father and I agreed to being these roles in each other’s lives. We also have a past life history of this, switching roles in each life. I appreciate all I have learned from him and the situation. I appreciate him giving me the beautiful gift of being a Mom. Without him, I wouldn’t be the strong, beautiful, successful, independent, amazing psychic-medium I am today.
The best advice I can give you is to listen to your heart, but combine that with your emotions. You know, how the situation or person makes you feel. This is the perfect receipe for success. What's meant to be will be, so don't fight the Universe, go with the flow.